Tu Hoang parttime Ruby dev, fulltime Bun Rieu maniac

Society

There are so many things about this collection of people that I feel uneasy about, but isn’t that a thing about societies? You group like minded people together, and it’s personal that you don’t feel like you can go along with a certain strait of minds.

That’s fine. That’s why I have been traveling. After 5 years of hopping on and off continents, I find that almost all societies are alike.

Out of 100 people, 99 will most likely ask you How old are you and What do you do and stop dead when you tell them something they don’t know (ie: I manage a fleet of machines running various software and I spend most of my timing tweaking .cfg files). I guess that’s why Tinder and its Unmatch feature is such treasured. People oftentimes judge another person by their looks and professions. The same group of people don’t have enough mental attention and capability to take time diving into another’s walk of life. Time is literally worth more than gold for everyone. Everyone. Not just the rich.

I tend to give close ones a copy of The Fountainhead. People either hate it or like it. I always look forward to hearing what they think about this work, because almost always people get very opinionated about it. That’s fine. The point is to hear opinions, though opinions can change. Hence the follow-up discussion. This activity is for me to learn more about people around me. And for them to learn more about me. I’d go as far as saying that the discussion that follows is just as important as seeing whether they have an opinion about the book.

People often get mad at me because I’d like to learn how they arrive at a decision. Take this girl for example, she’s spending 2 years straight out of college to study German so that she can enroll in a master course on finance. I asked what the point of going for a master degree was, how she thought of an opinion that financial (or service, in general) workers are of abundance, how “enriching knowledge” (as per the given reason for going further the tuition chain) helps her in short and (if foreseeing allows) long term.

What I’d like to tell her in the end is it’s fine to not have an answer to all the questions, but she was too mad at me for firing all these questions, she assumed I was such an arse (which, I don’t think applies, because an arse tends to hurt people, whereas I truly tended to learn more about her).

Example above tells how I view the world as of now. Basically:

  • There are too many walks in life and as a mortal, I can’t afford going through all. The act of networking (from my side) is entirely selfish, I get to know you and try to befriend you because: (i) you bring a new set of views into my life and (ii) hopefully I can do the same thing. Be it selfish, befriending someone and taking their time off are critical deeds, ones that I don’t take lightly.

  • One needs to do things wholeheartedly. 99% of the society will tell you it’s not worth doing so, and you can hear feedbacks, but the decision is yours. Once you have decided, go all in. Don’t be half arsed. Hopping is fine, as long as you have given it your all before moving on. Don’t compare, because comparison is always subjective. It’s not absolute, hence it doesn’t weigh much in your decision. You can blame family and finance and residence status (this doesn’t apply for people living in warzones), but here is a fact: there’s no free lunch. Those people with a supporting family and readily available finance, why do they have to do with your decision? Living your passion (or trying it) is not easy, not because the environment isn’t always supportive (though sometimes they can be greatly not), but because it’s given. As given as being mortal. You can live in a hut off Son Doong, or you can stay at a penthouse in Mitte, life is always tough bruv. Power through.

That said, given I have been in it for some time, people often ask me for opinions. What’s fun is, this is not the act of me beaming my experience all over you and demanding respect, so don’t take it that way. This is me sharing my findings along the way and sincerely hope you can give me yours some other time. What’s even more fun, I half expect you to fire back at me, at how I arrived at those myself. The core of this is my absolute belief in performing good work. It’s mutual. Friends usually get surprised when I talk and discuss, work wise, to people I am extremely against. But then I reply: why does my personal feeling have to do with the good work itself?